DarthFlip vs Clara/Glorfindel [Archive]

DarthFlip

06-13-2002, 09:18 AM

A long long time ago in a galaxy far away.......Two powerful warriors Clara and Temujin wnet around the galaxy trying to kill each other. Later in his travels, Temujin joined forces with another evil warrior Hans_polojr who was even more hell bent on killing Clara.

As time passed the 3 warriors tried many times to destroy each other and sometimes even destroying planets to do so, however all attemtps failed and the 3 warriors had 1 final battle

Hans_polojr always thought that Clara was the one who threw him off a cliff but as now heard a rumour that his former partner in crime, Temujin beat the poo poo out of him by hurling bricks. All of this is a blur 2 him

Clara survived..along with temujin ( who is now Glorfindel) and they teamed up together believing one of them had killed Hans_polojr...OR SO THEY THOUGHT

Hans_polojr...was later found by Darth Sidious who taught him a few handy tircks and in honour of his master, Changed his name to Darth Flip

And so the next saga of the great battle between Clara and Temujin (sorry now DarthFlip vs Clara & Glorfindel) Begins!!!

Clara

06-14-2002, 12:06 AM

Oh goody. May the Arnie quote battles begin!!!

Four months ago Glorfindel and Clara had discovered their true feelings for each other. The reason they had fought so bitterly was due soley to the fact that they were both madly in love with each other, and started dating.

At this point in time, Clara had been searching the holonet and was on the Galactic Senate site when she discovered a rather disturbing fact: Hands_Polojr was alive and well, and going under the name of Darth Flip.

She quickly alerted her beloved Glorfindel, and the two set about seeking out the possessed Dark Lord.

DarthFlip

06-14-2002, 06:57 AM

Flips plan had finally been put into motoin. Clara and Glorfindel were falling right into his trap and he would soon have his revenge on them!

Admiral DaaLa

06-14-2002, 12:19 PM

Daala watched another famous battle occur with much ammusement :D

/green{I though i'd put my two cents worth in, have fun }

glorfindel

06-16-2002, 11:37 PM

after unfreezing himself, Glorfindel ordererd a drink to go and then wandered out to his ship, he had given up on using expensive ship's, people just kept blowing them up whenever he landed them so the ship he now flew was nothing more than an old YT1300 corelian transport, cheep and reliable and easily modified to suit his needs.

Clara dicided that in order to save a bit of credit on fuel she would join him on his ship.

at the helm Glorfindel punched in the coordinates for the system where he knew they would find Darth Flip, it was an alternitive system well beyond the outer rim of the galaxy, known well as the last place in the universe any creature with a hint of good taste or dignity would be caught dead, consiquently Flip had moved there and felt right at home.

"well, it's going to take a while to get there... I dident spend much time or cradit on the hyperdrive and Flip's system is on the otherside of the galaxy... let's have a few more drink's to kill some time" said Glorfindel, when they were safely in hyperspace and he had done a complete scan of the ship for any unwanted suprises or tracers.

Clara

06-17-2002, 01:30 AM

I would write what we do in hyperspace, Glorfindel, but I think its a bit AO rated

They reached the planet without incident, and quickly set about setting everything up for Flip's arrival. One of the first things Clara did was contact her twin brother and check that all was well in the cloning facility.

"Why?" He asked.

"Hands_Polo's back, only under a different name and well trained."

"So? You could kick his arse with your eyes closed, standing on one leg, and with your arms tied behind your back."

"I know that. I'm talking about clones of Glorfindel!"

"Oh. Yeah, alls well. And if you need a hand, call. Its been a while since I've done any serious butt whipping."

"You got it, little brother."

DarthFlip

06-17-2002, 01:57 AM

Flip was aware that Clara and Glorfindel had arrived and had his ambush ready! Within seconds thousands of droids (100 thousands that is!) were charging at Clara and Glorfindel but that wasnt the olny thing Flip had in mind for his arch enemies!

Clara

06-17-2002, 02:08 AM

Clara took one look at the droids and groaned at how pathetic it was. "Oh please."

With a casual wave of her hand, every single droid exploded in a massive fireball.

"Hey Flip!" She called. "Come on! I at least expect something of a challange here!!!"

DarthFlip

06-17-2002, 02:13 AM

If your so good see this fools!!

Clara has a concernd look on her face

Vines come out of the ground latching on to Clara and Glorifindel! Well Well Well, Flips says with a smile, It looks like you are all tied up, geuss you didnt see this one! Now before you try a fancy trick Clara, I thought I would tell you that if u move one inch these vines will strangle AND kill you instantly!

So I will give you 2 a choice....Surrender now and follow me 2 my fortress or get choked to death.....you have 10 seconds to decide

Clara

06-17-2002, 02:16 AM

Clara stretched out with her mind and slid her corusca knife from her boot, slicing herself and Glorfindel free. She then used the Force to send spikes at Flip, pinning him against the wall.

She walked toward him. "Nice of you to stick around."

DarthFlip

06-17-2002, 02:20 AM

That wont stop me you pathetic fool! Flip sets himself free, He yet again freezes Glorfindel and turns his attention to Clara..."Your fired!!" And in saying that shoots Clara with a fireball which sends her flying throuh the air! He then goes to glorfindel and asks "Would you like to be a farmer?"

Flip then says "Well here is a couple of acheres" and kicks him fair and square in the mummy daddy button which shoots Glorfindel in the air...quickly following his comrade Clara!

Clara

06-17-2002, 07:55 AM

Clara picks herself up, grabbing Flip with the Force and dangling him over the edge of a cliff.

"Flip, you remember when I told you I would kill you last?"

A look of horror crosses Flip's face as deja vu sets in. "No! Don't say it!-"

Clara grinned. "I lied."

She dropped him, and had the pleasure of watching him fall. She heard Glorindel come up behind her.

"Where's Flip?" He askes, obviously peeved off.

Clara glanced back at her lover. "I let him go."

glorfindel

06-18-2002, 01:04 AM

Glorfindel watched as Flip fell, useing his own force power to slam him into the cliff face repeatedly as plumited down toward the nasty big pointy rock at the bottem, Flip screamed in pain and terror then just befour he hit the rocks at the bottem he stoped and with equal speed he began to fall back up the sheer drop, still smashing onto the wall as he ascended.

He reached the top uncontious.

"he dident fall... inconcevable" said Clara looking a little confused.

"what fun is it if we kill him now, let's have a little fun with him, then kill him" stated Gloorfindel.

"he looks dead already" Clara said looking at the bloody pulp suspended in front of her

"he's only mosly dead, there's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead... mostly dead is still slightly alive, but all dead, there's only one thing to do with somebody who's all dead" said Glorfindel, floating Flip toward the ship as he spoke

"whats that" asked Clara

"go through his pocket's and look for loose change. do you remember when I turned you into a chicken???"

Clara gave Glorfindel a look that could have shatterd glacier's

"let's turn flip into something... fun... any suggestions?"

Clara

06-18-2002, 01:32 AM

Climbing into the ship, they tied Flip to a bulkhead. He came to, and watched them as they began to move.

Clara looked back at him. "That Flip, he can fuss."

"Fuss, fuss..." Glorindel shrugged "I think he like to scream at us."

"Probably he means no harm."

"He's really very short on charm."

Clara grinned, looking at her beloved. "You have a great gift for rhyme."

Glorfindel nodded. "Yes, yes, some of the time."

By now, Flip is starting to get annoyed."Enough of that!"

Clara gazed forward and frowned. "Glorfindel, are there rocks ahead?"

He shrugged in reply. "If there are, we all be dead!"

Flip is starting to go red in the face. No more rhymes now, I mean it!"

Glorfindel pulls something out of his pocket and holds it out. "Anybody want a peanut?"

"DYEEAAHHHHHH!!" Flip's scream echos through space.

glorfindel

06-18-2002, 03:17 AM

The device Glorfindel emerced Flip in a strange light, he attempted to strugle but found that he was completely imobile, the device hummed then a voice came out of it

"gene sample accepted and cloned, please key in new genetic structure..."

Glorfindel pressed a few butten's, there was a flash and there was no Flip. Where the sith had been there was now a small, scragy chichen, it clucked iritably.

"Oop's... wrong sequence" said Glorfindel "try again..."

Glorfindel punched a few more button's and the chicken dissapered to be replaced by a hampster.

"Damn it... stupid hexydecimal keypad... where is the recall sequence" Glorfindell punched a couple more buttons and Flip reapered, still traped in the light.

"what was it like being a hampster?" asked Clara

"It was better than being a chicken... I mean, you've seen the size of an egg... you've seen the size of a chicken's bum... that's what all the clucking was about, I was trying to say in chicken talk 'for god sake give me an epidural" replied Flip, still trying to escape

"wait a moment... I remember, it's blue yellow red." Glorfindel punched a few buttons on his comunicator and the ship's servant, an Ewok came into the room.

It looked around and screamed in fear, the light emerced the Ewok and Glorfindel laughed

"Now see what delightfull horrors I have to unleash uppon thee" Glorfindel said too DarthFlip. he pressed something on the device and the Ewok was transmogrified into a peanut.

calmly Glorfindel picked up the peanut, tossed it into the air and caught it it his mouth, there was a crunch and the feintest sound of screaming. Glorfindel swallowed and turned to Clara

"Do you like smooth or crunchy???"

they both turned to Flip and licked their lip's

Glorfindel hit the buttons on the device...

Clara

06-18-2002, 03:26 AM

Oooo. That is cruel. Me like! :devil:

"I prefer salty, actually."

Flip struggled, but got a lucky break when the device exploded. Then, to his horror, Clara pulled out her lightsaber.

"Guess we'll just have to do it the hard way."

She was about to swing, when an irritating familiar Gungan walked into the room.

The Gungan grinned. "Mesa Jar Jar Binks! Mesa your humble..."

Clara turned and swung the blade several times, and slice the Gungan into little bitty tiny bits.

"Rest in pieces," she said, grinning as she heared the cheers of all those reading this.

glorfindel

06-18-2002, 03:39 AM

"why... why must I be punished in this way??? first Flip comes back then the only other creature int the galaxy that can iritate more than him, then my transmogrification machine blow's up. I AM A LITTLE UPSET RIGHT NOW." Glorfindel turned his attention to flip

"YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO CALL YOURSELF THE GREATEST SITH IN THE GALAXY... I'LL SHOW YOU POWER" Glorfindel pionted at Flip, purple lightning shot from his fingertip's into DarthFlip's eye's and mouth.

He screamed in agony "father please"

"Oh like we've never heard that befour" replied Glorfindel, blasting him again

"you have such an electrick personality, dont you." Clara said as she advanced on the frying Flip.

Clara

06-18-2002, 03:47 AM

Clara grinned. "I was once told, that where there is electricity, you should keep water far away. I've always wondered why."

She grabbed a nearby jug of water and threw it at Flip. He screamed as the electricity and water mixed. The two lovers looked on.

"Oh," Clara said. "That's why."

DarthFlip

06-18-2002, 05:17 AM

Flip.....who is now very very very PEEVED OFF breaks free and goes absolutely ape droppings at Clara and Glorfindel. He shoots lightning bolts at the both of them knocking the weaklings out instantly. Flip throws the lovers off their own ship and claims it his own. Have a nice fall flip screams with a grin on his face!

glorfindel

06-18-2002, 10:26 PM

Unfortunataly for Flip the ship was still on the ground, so the fall was not long.

Clara and Glorfindel came to and colectively glared at DarthFlip, what happend next is too messy and gratuitously violent to describe but the end result is best described as... painfull.

"hey Clara what do you call a man with no arms and leg's hanging on the wall?" asked Glorfindel, a bemused smile on his face.

Clara shruged.

"Art... and what do you call the blood stains with chunky bit's on the wall next to Art?"

Once again Clara shruged.

"Piece's of art"

Both Glorfindel and Clara laughed, and kept laughing untill they were both crying then they laughed some more. DarthFlip did not laugh, he did cry though. Then he passed out.

Glorfindel looked at Clara and said "well, he's completely 'armless' now"

DarthFlip

06-18-2002, 11:41 PM

If Glorfindel had have taken some time to study his opponent he wouold realise Flip has the ability to regenerate his limbs, so Flip does this and then lays the absolute smackdown on Glorfindel and Clara by shoving lighsabers up there rear ends, then throwing them off the ship yet again and then flying off into hyperspace!!!

Clara

06-19-2002, 12:00 AM

Clara pulls a device from her pocket. "Sorry dear, but it looks like you're going to have to buy a new ship."

Pressing the button, the ship holding Flip explodes.

glorfindel

06-19-2002, 01:03 AM

"You do realise that I now have to get a new ship..." said Glorfindel.

he began to search through the many hidden pocket's of his robe's, he pulled out a small container and a water flask, then he opered the container and poured out a small amount of powder onto the ground and poured some water on it.

A few secconds passed and then the ground began to shake, there was a fleas and in front of Glorfindel there had appeared an olympic size swimming pool.

"Wrong one, that was my de-hydrated swimming pool formula."

He shuffled through his robes again and prodeced another small container with wich he repeated the same process, this time after the flash there appeared a sleek, black beautifully styled interplatitary fighter ship.

Clara looked at Glorfindel impressed.

"I always keep some spare's in case of an emergency, nanno technology is such a wonderfull thing, these attom-sized robots rearange the atomic structure of whatever material they have at hand into the pre-programed structure, they also instantly repair any damage the ship might take" said Glorfindel smugly.

"Let's go" said Clara, heading toward the new ship curoius to investigate whether Flip had somehow survived.

DarthFlip

06-19-2002, 07:38 AM

Of course Flip survives!!!

Flip jumped out of the ship before it exploded. He fell do the ground and knocked himself out, but he soon woke up and headed after Clara and Glorfindel

Clara

06-20-2002, 07:43 AM

You know, I always thought it was impossible to jump out of a ship when its in hyperspace, but hey! I'm just as obsessed Star Wars Fanatic. What do I know?

The two did a quick scan, discovering that the ship was completely distroyed. They lay in wait, wondering just what Flip would try next...

DarthFlip

06-25-2002, 02:36 AM

Hey!! Im Darth Flip!!! I can pull pff anything

Flip spys on Clara and Glorifindel, still injured from his fall he waits until Clara kisses Glorfindel. He then freezes their lips together and tells them to "stick around" and runs off to find another ship to get of this lousy planet

glorfindel

06-25-2002, 05:34 AM

fortunataly the two were so hot together that by the time they had finished they were already unstuck and dident even notice that they had been frozen to begin with.

"wow... I thought we were in hyperspace, then all of sudden we're back on this stupid planet again, wierd" said Glorfindel

"no point in worying, these things just happen all the time. One minuit you'r in space then you're in a cantina half a galaxy away then you're back on the ground of some planet you thought you had just left, happens every day" Clara explained matter of factly.

"did you feel a slight chill a just then, only I thought a senced Flip then there was a momentary sensation of cold, then someone said 'Chill out' and then nothing"

Clara blinked then said "It sound's like something He'd if he had just done something stupid like try to freeze our lip's together..."

Glorfindel looked irate "The little...(the folowing quotation has been censored in name of good taste) I'll really have to hurt him this time"

Clara looked slightly worried "not the... evill H's..." Glorfindel nodded "No, you know what happened last time, they got loose and nearly took over the galaxy, you cant"

"I know last time was a bit of a fiasco but I can controll them now look" Glorfindel opened a pouch hidden inside his robes and a small fuzzy black Hampster leaped out and sat at Glorfindel's feet looking inocent

"This is Mikey. Mikey be nice to Clara, she's a friend" The hampster leaped into Clara's arms and behaved in a most adorable way.

"He doesent look very dangerous, not like the last lot with machine gun turrets and nasty big pointy teeth and stuff" said Clara stroking the little fuzz ball

"Mikey, kill that tree" Glorfindel indicated the tree he ment.

Mikey sliped out of Clara's grasp and quick as a flash leaped the 20 or so meter's to the tree and within a few secconds all that was left of it was a pile of wood chips and leaves, everything else was shredded all over the place.

Clara gaped

"Impressed" asked Glorfindel. Mikey was back in his arms and a seccond later back in the pouch.

DarthFlip

06-25-2002, 07:48 AM

Flip was off the planet now after finding ship and thought that Glorfindel might unleash is Evil little hampsters on him. But it didnt worry him, they would have to find which planet Flip was going to and get there first to set up a ambush. This was unlikely to happen!!!

glorfindel

06-26-2002, 01:05 AM

style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/devil.gif (hampster)

Flip was totally unaware of the danger he was in. The hampster's had already gotten on board the ship and were waiting to ambush him as soon as the time was right, and that time was now.

Flip had decided to go to bed to reserve his strength for the battle he thought was ahead of him, how wrong he was.

The Evil hampsters attacked, devouring Flip's arm's and legs in an instant and adminstering force blinding vurus that stoped him from regenerating.

Clara and Glorfindel closed in.

DarthFlip

06-26-2002, 07:45 AM

What glorfindel didnt know was that this was a hologram of Flip, anticipating Glorfindel or Clara would do something like this. Flip had left the planet ages ago, The two "so called" warriors had been trying to kill a hologram for the last 5 hours!!!

Clara

06-27-2002, 08:16 AM

Once again, Flip had been hallucinating. He had thought the two were attacking the hologram, but in truth, they had snuck up behind him. Clara pulled out a blaster and pressed it against the back of his neck.

"Guess who?"

DarthFlip

06-28-2002, 07:20 AM

Once again Clara had killed a clone of Flip has he was enjoying life on another planet with lots of beatufil Arielles....I mean wookies!!!

Clara

06-29-2002, 07:25 AM

Kill? Kill? I haven't killed anyone yet. I want to have a bit of fun first. style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/tongue.gif

Clara whacked him across the back of the head. "Wake up, bozzo. Its time to play a game."

She knocked him out, and when he came to, he found that he was in his birthday suit, tied to a pole in a cove, the tide coming in.

Clara waved for the shore. "I'm interested in how long you can hold your breath, so I'm going to time you." She pulled out a timer. "If you survive the night, and haven't drowned, frozen, or the sharks haven't had a go at what little you have, then I think that you just might have a record!"

glorfindel

07-01-2002, 06:45 AM

There was flash in the water, then Flip (the real flip) was teleported from the planet he had been on to find himself chained up with his clone in a most embaresing position.

"when I told you to fo f#@k yourself I dident mean for you to take it literally" said Glorfindel as he apperated next to Clara.

Glorfindel's ship hovered out over the water in front of the cove there was a series of splashing sound's and the water around flip and Flip began to froth, white for a moment then red. flip screamed in agony, Flip on the other hand just screamed as the flesh was striped from the bones of flip, so far Flip was unharmed.

"what exactly did you just set on flip" Clara asked as she watched flip being devoured from the knee's up.

"mutant pirana's crossed with..." he was cut short

"not hampster's again" clara said with a groan

"of course not... why would you even think that... OK it's true, I crossed the pirana's with hampster's.

Clara

07-02-2002, 07:55 AM

Clara rolled her eyes.

"Why am I not surprised."

glorfindel

07-11-2002, 05:16 AM

"I'm now thinking that once Flip is destroyed I'll quit being an evill sith lord and start up an intergalactic petting zoo/center for kid's who dont read good and want to learn to do other stuff good too" Glorfindel said with a wishfull smile and a far away look in his eye's "or I might just continue cruising the galaxy killing random stranger's and taking their money, not sure what would be more fun"

the screams from flip and Flip began to fade as the water turned progressively more red.

"wanna go back to the ship and play kama-sutra twister?" Glorfindel asked Clara

Clara

07-11-2002, 07:56 AM

An evil grin spread across Clara's face. "Yeah, baby, yeah!"

Flip watched as the vanished into the ship, wondering what was worse: The torture that was being inflicted upon him... or Clara and Glorfindel talking dirty.

glorfindel

07-15-2002, 02:25 AM

a few moments later flip hear's "owch, is that me or you?? that's not suposed to go there... mmmm"

Flip rolled his eye's and went back to concentrating on the pain.

Clara

08-07-2002, 12:46 AM

Flip suddenly heard a drilling noise and turned sharply to the wall and spotted a drill piece coming through the wall. He tried to pull away but it moved into his leg, causing him to scream in pain.

"Screw you Flip!" Clara yelled. "Screw you!"

Clara

08-09-2002, 01:15 AM

Flip goes to Clara after screming his lungs out "you think this is Flip" Clara stops drilling him and looks at him. Flip says "It is" and he pulls a claser on Clara and blows her away. Flip then makes a smooth exit

Clara

08-18-2002, 10:44 PM

^ Flips post

Clara was luckily wearing a bullet proof vest, and set about the chase. It didn't take her long to track him, pinning him into a corner. Using the Force, Clara called up a swarm of pharana beetles, who set about their task.

DarthFlip

08-19-2002, 04:41 AM

With a snap of his fingers Flip destroyed the beetles. Hahaha you think your pathetic beetles can beat me fool? I THINK NOT! :devil:!!! Flip then uses the force to send Clara hundreds of metres back wondering what the hell happend to Glorfindel

Clara

08-19-2002, 08:28 AM

Clara glared at Flip. "You want to play? Lets play."

She reached into the clouds, controling them, and struck down with bolt of lightening, frying Flip.

She grinned. "Nice flash, Flip. I should have you charged with indecent exposure."

DarthFlip

08-20-2002, 04:14 AM

Flip laughed at Clara! HA! You think that was good? well check this out. Flip throws a fireball at Clara which is a direct hit! Clara runs to the nearest lake to douse her burning anus. Flip turns away and says "Let of some steam Clara". Then he walks off into the sunset.

Clara

08-20-2002, 08:50 PM

Only it wasn't the sunset. It was in fact a Force generated fireball created by none other then Clara herself. She burst out laughing as Flip screamed as he stepped into it.

"Just the way I like my Sith Lords. Medium to very well done." She smirked. "And yes, I would like fries with that."

DarthFlip

08-20-2002, 08:52 PM

Luckily for Flip he came out with a very bad Tan! He continued walking plotting his next attack on Clara.

Clara

08-20-2002, 09:17 PM

Clara raised an eyebrow. "Nope. Not quite don yet. You need to go back in the oven." Using the Force, she threw him back into the fireball.

DarthFlip

08-21-2002, 04:53 AM

Flip also using the force Pulls Clara into the fireball, while he catapaults himself out of there!

Clara

08-23-2002, 01:03 AM

But Clara is immune to fire. Pulling out her lightsabers, she uses Flip as target practice.

"Rest in peaces, Flip."

DarthFlip

08-23-2002, 01:26 AM

Flip, being the clever bunny he is, regenerates himself and takes off!! Leaving Clara behind in the dust!

Clara

08-23-2002, 01:36 AM

Clara pulls out bazooca and blows Flip away. After all, she has very good eyesight, and Flip is slower then a snail!!!

DarthFlip

08-23-2002, 01:48 AM

Clara thought she blew Flip away but it was Flip's shadow which turned human because he was running so fast!

glorfindel

08-23-2002, 01:51 AM

Glorfindel decided that he'd had enough of this and yelloed out "if you two would just stop flirting for a minit, we could sort out some sort of compramise"

Clara

08-23-2002, 01:55 AM

Clara turned to her beloved in a state of shock. "What? You finally decide to show up and now you want a peace treaty! You spend to much time in the Singles Cantina drinking."

DarthFlip

08-23-2002, 01:58 AM

While these two lovers had yet another fight Flip escaped and set of into another part of the Galaxy!

Clara

08-23-2002, 02:00 AM

Clara placed her hands on her hips and glared at Glorfindel. "Now look. He's got away." She shoulder passed him and went inside the ship. "Hurry up!"

Blizzard

10-06-2002, 05:14 PM

bump

Lister_Of_Smeg

10-07-2002, 02:07 AM

"Sorry, I or rather my computer have been in a coma for teh last few months or so and as such I have had to have another identity change" said Glorfindel or as he now prefered to be called, Sir Lister Of Smeg!

the tall dark and handsom youth turned and beheld the behind of his beloved entering the ship. "I comeing my princess of perfetion, pain and peices of flesh seared and cut into lot's of little smoldering bit's" and folowed her inside. a few moment's later there came the sound of a slap and cry of pain.

Lister_Of_Smeg

10-07-2002, 02:10 AM

BTW, hi Blizz. How you doin?

Clara

10-07-2002, 08:36 AM

Clara smiled in satisfaction as she dropped into the pilot seat, Lister into the one beside her, a handprint on his face.

"Note," she said to him as she fired up the engines. "Pick a name and stick with it."

Lister_Of_Smeg

10-08-2002, 01:19 AM

Temulin... I mean glorfindel... no, Sir Smeg looked at her and smiled "sorry honey, I try to but for some reason I cant keep a good name for myself... I wonder why?"

The ship blasted off into the eternal darkness of space and then dissapeared with a flesh into hyperspace.

"So, look's like we have a bit of free time, just the two of us all alone... that doesent happen very often for us, wanna go lie down so I can give you a long and gentle massage?" (or should I try you're pick up line and be you in the morning?)

Clara

10-08-2002, 07:10 AM

The sound of the slap echoed throughout the ship...

glorfindel

10-23-2002, 12:44 AM

"ohhh yes!!!!!!!!! hit me harder you're gran high evillness"

Clara

10-23-2002, 12:46 AM

The sound of a metal rod connecting with a skull filled the corridor

glorfindel

10-24-2002, 02:31 AM

When Glorfindel woke up from being KO'd he looked at Clara and smilled "where did you pull that mettal rod from my love?" he said and grinned from ear to ear

"Is there any chance we can ignore the iminent destruction of the universe from the evill dominions of Flip for a while so we can hop on the good foot and do the bad thing again? or would you like one of my famous back and leg massages?" he asked before Clara could strike with the bar whick had appeared in her hand again withoun apearing to have to go through all the messy buisness of being moved from... wherever it was that it had been lodged before.

"By the way, you do look smashing in that robe" said Glorfindel

glorfindel

11-01-2002, 01:19 AM

Clara grinned for a moment then replied "well now, let me see"

"you can see anything you want to, wanna find out how big my lightsaber is when you... turn it on?" asked Glorfindel in a casual sort of way. style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/evil.gif

Clara

11-01-2002, 05:58 AM

Clara frowned, raising an eyebrow. "You look hot."

Glorfindel opened his mouth and was about to make a fitting reply when a bubble of water fell onto his head. The princess chuckled as she walked passed him and into the rear of the ship.

"A bit wet are you? I always said you were all washed up."

glorfindel

11-01-2002, 06:08 AM

"I figured it was you that was 'wet' my love, and how did you know I kept a seccond bedroom back there?" ha replied, once again grinning and watched her leave intently before folowing.

Clara

11-01-2002, 06:41 AM

A crack echoed through the ship as Glorfindel stumbled back holding his nose that had been squashed by the closing door. Reaching for the handle, he discovered it to be locked. Hearing a noise, he ran to the cockpit and discovered that Clara had boarded the hidden fighter and taken off, leaping into hyperspace and leaving him behind. He held his bleeding nose and slumpt into the chair.

"God damn it!"

glorfindel

11-01-2002, 07:54 PM

"perhaps she's trying to tell me something... Na, just playing hard to get" he thought as he cut out the door with his lightsaber.

"I hope she realised that the freighter she just took off in was boobitraped to have the hyperdrive melt down after 30 secconds unless it got handprint identificaction from me" muttered Glorfindel as he meandered up to the controll room and hit the tracker on the hyperdrive autopiolet.

A few moments later the ship vanished into hyperspace for about 30 secconds then stoped again, halfway between two galaxies with nothing but a few rouge asteroids within lightyears.

Asteroids and a ship. Glorfindel opened his com system "so... problem with the hyperdrive then my dear" he said smugly

"You style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/censored.gif style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/censored.gif style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/censored.gif why dident you tell me the ship was boobitraped?" came the less than pleased response

"you never asked, and you may hae noticed, no spare on board. and guess what, I dont have one either, nor will my hyperdrive fit into that ship as it's about the same size. so guess what my dear, seeing as you broke my nose my skull and hurt my ego, BONVOYAGE!!! I'l come back in a day or two or seven when you have realised that there's no food on board either HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH" Glorfindel was pissed off and begining to feel some of those homocidal sentiment's toward Clara again

And so, before there was chance to hear a response he shut down the com system, aimed the lazer cannon very carefully, blasted out her com system, blasted her with an Ion Cannon and then just to finish the job properly, hit the ship with a few magneedo radioactive dust missiles which would stop anyone being able comunicate to or from the ship and stop it showing up on radar as well as suppressing any comunication through the force.

Glorfindel then decided to go get a nice Curry and a massage with a happy ending. and blasted off into hyperspace.

glorfindel

11-01-2002, 07:58 PM

sorry honey, you said you wanded a tiff so hear it is, I still love you though style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/bigsmile.gif

Clara

11-03-2002, 06:37 AM

Well, I have my secret weapon to get me out of the situation.

Less then an hour after Glorfindel had left the system, a ship leapt into view. Clara grinned and waited for it to pull alongside and let her climb across the link.

She grinned as she stepped into the cockpit. "And about time, little brother."

Clinton waved the comment off as he turned the ship around. "Just tell me your destination."

Clara's grin widened. "The Maw. He won't know that I have been rescued if he can't sense me or contact me. It will also give me a chance to plan my revenge."

Her twin laughed. "Your wish is my command."

As he swung the ship around and keyed in her desination, Clara pulled out a control from the pocket of her outfit. She laughed as she hit the button. "Mine wasn't the only ship boobytrapped, sweetheart."

Don't worry. I still love ya

glorfindel

11-03-2002, 06:56 AM

Relaxing under the shade of a palm tree on a distant planet Glorfindel herd an all too familiar exploding sound.

"bugger, I just got that ship" he said as a bronzed beutifull semiclad slave girl gave him a good hard back massage.

"Oh well, It was fun while it lasted" he thought and went back to relaxing for a while because he had the feeling that he would be experiencing a lot more tension in the next few weeks.

Jaina Solo Durron

11-04-2002, 07:39 AM

Carla Maganna sighed, stopped the crazy holovid and got up to get herself another drink and snack...

"Really, Clara, you two are worse than a pair of children..."

-JSD/self-appointed Carla Maganna, Clara's (big?) sis...

Clara

11-04-2002, 08:09 AM

5-years-older JSD. Carla is a healer by the way. She was last taken on by a good friend of mine, who killed her off. I still have that story by the way...

Clara shrugged it off. "I'm sure you'll get over it sis. Right now, I need a shower. So if you'll excuse me..."

glorfindel

11-05-2002, 02:20 AM

Glorfindel was realy enjoying himself by this time, Clara had not realised but he had hidden nanno camera's on her clothes which had just shown him exactly who Clara has with and where she was, better still she had just finished haveing a very long hot soapy shower and the camera's had recorded it all, which made the happy ending to his massage all the better.

Now feeling very relaxed and alltogether contented Glorfindel went to see the damage to his ship and whether it could be repaired.

where there had once been an expensive and highly advanced fighter there was now a black and chared mess that closely resembled one of Glorfindel's drunken cooking attempt's.

Not too fussed Glorfindel went to the nearby ship yard where his old friend and long time ex partner worked.

"guess what Harvy? I need a new ship... again" he said as he aproached his ol friend. Harvy was from a distant planet unknown to the majority of the galaqy and he somewhat resembled a 6 foot tall rabbit with no fur.

"you got a lot of nerve comeing here, after what you pulled" replied Harvy somewhat acridly.

"what??? it wasent my fault, I told you it was a stuoid idea to try to catch a lightsaber with youre feet" said Glorfindel trying no to look at Harvy's feet of rather the lack therof.

"yea well enough of that, you got any credit? I know you too well to give you a tab." Harvy said in an accusing tone.

"I got better than money, I have Clara's credit card" Glorfindel said as he waved the card in Harvy's face.

all of a sudden Harvy became much more friendly. "so you need a ship, I got just the thing, it's got you're name all over it you're going to love this!!!" Harvy said as he led Glorfindel down to a secret garage under the main shop. "this thing has all the extra's you could want I'm telling you automatic seat's power stearing, 22 I say again 22 high speed turet mounted lazer cannon's, mounting's for any sort of rocket's you want, the fastest engin in the galaxy both for hyper jets and in system, quantem armor and sheilding and to top it all off it has 57 cup holder's in the controll room alone!" said harvy without once stopping for breath.

Glorfindel handed the credit card to Harvy who dissapered for a moment then came back looking very pleased. "the ship is yourse and the card is overdrawn just like you asked for" Harvy said as came back

"Splendid, this is why I dont keep a credit or any other sort of bank account" said Glorfindel as ge steped on board the ship and then blasted off into the night sky in search of an aly too help kick Clara's ass

He engaged the hyperjet's and dissaperered into hyperspace, while waiting to reach his destination Glorfindel replayed his video of Clara in the shower.

Clara

11-05-2002, 05:56 AM

Clara had been full aware of the camera, and had pulled the show just for his liking. Waving into it as she pulled it from her clothes, she then proceeded to flush it down the toilet.

Turning she dried her hair and pulled on fresh clothes. A knock on the door pulled her from her thoughts.

"What is it little brother?"

"Some one just pulled some major money off your card?"

"Which one?"

"The bugged one with all the alarms and security is now hot on the trail of your former lover.

"Good. Tell me when they catch up with him. I'll be in library."

There was a pause. "Micheal's in the library as well. He's looking up ways to build new bombs and slave rigs for screwballs ship."

Clara smiled. "Goody. I'll go help him."

Jaina Solo Durron

11-05-2002, 07:06 AM

Carla looks up from her holovid as Clara passes through the room to the library.

Sensing what's on her little sister's mind, Carla sighs again.

"Don't blow up anything too important this time, Clis dear."

-JSD/Carla Maganna

Clara

11-07-2002, 07:06 AM

Clara flashes her sister the Maganna grin as she passes and makes her way to the library. Micheal looked up from where is was working and waved her to a seat.

"Let's see what we can find, shall we?"

Jaina Solo Durron

11-07-2002, 11:26 AM

*switches off the holovid - it was getting boring anyway - and grabs a plate of food from the kitchen*

Carla joins her lil sis and Micheal in the library...

"I feel like making a little chaos....what? Just because I'm the eldest one, you automatically think I should be all goody-goody-two-shoes and lookk after the little kids? Well no-sir-ee, that ain't gonna happen. So I'm staying right here and helping blow up that treacherous...being....you call your beloved, Clara."

By this time, JSD realises that both Micheal and Clara are staring at her like she's just grown another head.

*sigh* Fine. I'll shut up. style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/tongue.gif

-JSD

glorfindel

11-19-2002, 06:30 AM

Glorfindel in the mean time had gone to another of his old friends who was an ex-military survivalist paranoid obsessive compulsive defence contractor who had worked fro the last few hundred years on makeing his home planet absolutly fortified against any form of attack or anyone ever finding there way to or from his home once they arived.

Glorfindel walked in the back door and grinned as A.J Rimmer BSC SSC (Bronze Swimming Cirtificate and Silver Swiming Cirtificate) leaped from his seat at his survalence moniter's and fumbled for one of the gun's in his belt at the same time as shouting "Identify yourself"

Glorfindel saluted and replied "Comander of teh enimy wishes to surender all hampster regiment's and make's a peace offering with this genuine imitation of YMCA by the vilage people" he then began singing and doing the actions to the song he had mentioned.

Rimmer glared at him and sat back down "I need to work on my security system, the auto gun's diddent work" he said as he went back to his moniter's

"they did but you forgot to load them again" said glorfindel merily "Look I need a place to stay and this is the only place in the galaxy I feel safe because no-one in their right mind would come here if they needed a place to be safe" he said as he wandered off into his old room and lay down trying to think of how to avoid being roasted alive by his dearly beloved Clara, he had to admit that he had been a little over reactionary and was going to verry sorry be the end of this little argument.

to clear his thought's he took out the holovid and watched Clara's shower again. he was begining to miss her quite a bit, then he though of how good the making up bit at the end of prolonged battle always was decided it was worth a bit of pain... quite a lot infact and so he plotted and then decided he was crap at plotting, he'd just wait till she arive'd then try to kick her ass, fail, run away, do something unpleasent to her, run away again and so on and so forth.

DarthFlip

12-02-2002, 08:51 AM

After going to every Cantina in the galaxy Flip decided it was time to hunt down his acrh enemy and finish her off once and for all!!!!

Flip was back and had never felt more powerful before!

glorfindel

12-04-2002, 10:23 PM

Glorfindel woke up with a feeling of a presence, a presence he had not felt since...

He pulled out a comunicator and switched it on "Umm, Clara sweety, you dont by any chance have a feeling of iminent stupidity do you? I think our old buddy Flippy-boy is back and is going to cause some suvere iritation. Now might be a good time to kiss and make up so we can concentrate on getting rid of him." Glorfindel waited for a reply.

DarthFlip

12-05-2002, 02:52 AM

Flip heard Glorfindels declaration of love and couldnt help but laugh until tears were running down his face!

Clara

12-05-2002, 06:46 AM

Glorfinderl almost hit the roof when his communicator exploded. "God damn it, when did she plant that one?!"

glorfindel

12-11-2002, 06:51 AM

"Oh well guess I'll just have to kill them both, starting with Flip" thought glorfindel when he had extinguished his flaming eyebrows.

but instead of bothering to try doing anything right now Glorfindel turned on his vid screen and watched Clara as she got undressed for bed. She had not gotten rid of all the camera's, they were self replicating nanno-bot's capable of turning anything into a camera. she really does have a fine figure.

Clara

12-12-2002, 06:26 AM

Little known to Glorfindel, Clinton was one step ahead, having faked the video and removed all the camera's. Also, Clara had switched rooms with Cathy, and bought an entire new wardrobe (all black), so there was no way Glorfindel could find any more videos.

glorfindel

12-12-2002, 06:50 AM

non-the-less, Glorfindel now had about 30 hours of unedited footage of Clara in interesting and compramising positions, all recorded before Clinton, the prat, had discovered the camera's.

glorfindel

12-30-2002, 02:37 AM

Glorfindel heard an explosion and a lot of swearing from the next room.

"Excriment!!! Flip's already here and I havent even finished my nap yet, Oh well, time for some idiocy" thought Glorfinded as he put on his robes.

Flip burst through the door with all his usual pitifull attempt's at purvading a sence of Evillness and fury but triped over the rug squeeled in pain when he landed on his key's then squeeled again when he fell through the floor.

Glorfindel just laughed, then threw a thermol detonator down the hole and ran out to his ship.

He only got half way when Clara leaped out behind him with a tazer and zaped Glorfindel untill he went balled, then she loaded him onto her ship and went in to find Flip and kill him in the slowest and most painfull way she knew how, which has verry long and verrry painfull.

Glorfindel in the mean time was being held by Micheal who was giving a full description of what Clara had planed for him which at that point Glorfindel thought might be worse than having that treatment applied, then he dicided that knowing Clara he would far rather just hear about it for as long as was posible.

Clara

12-30-2002, 05:52 AM

"You've got that right, sweetheart."

Jaina Solo Durron

01-15-2003, 08:45 PM

Carla watches the chaos for a few seconds, then shakes her head sadly.

"Will you three never grow up?"

Then Carla chucks a thermal detonator of her own into the ship Flip is currently occupying.

-JSD

glorfindel

01-30-2003, 04:21 AM

there was a bang then a series of agonised screams that grew lowder and lowder acompanied with a pathetic scraping sound, Golrfindel guessed what it was long before he saw it.

Flip had been cought in the explosion and was badly wounded, hence the screaming. he has now being draged slowly up the coridor toward the torture chamber and trying desperatly to get away, to no avail.

Glorfindel smiled smiled merily as he watched Flip being draged into the chamber and greeted him with as much cheere as one would address the sun after a cloudy day "Hello pig"

And Flip responded with his usual enthusiasim upon seeing his old comrade in arms "Oh sh... what the hell are YOU doing here?" he asked

"Well I would have thought that it was pretty obvious thet I have pissed off Clara as well and she is about to administer one of the most brutal and painfull tortures in the history of the galaxy, then release us." replied Glorfindel still maintaining his cheery tone

"why release us? wouldent she just kill us?" asked a confused Flip

"Oh, Noooo, that would be the nice and compassionate thing to do. No, what she's going to do is torture us to the brink of madness then stop let us heal and recover then do it again and again untill we can never heal or recover and live out the rest of our live's in total and compleet agony, much worse than death, infact I expect that death will seem like a holiday in Tahitty before this is over." ansowered Glorfindel, still smiling the whole time

"Why the hell are you still smilling you git? asked Flip who had soiled himself during the previous description

"Because, I know what she wear's when she's torturing and to see that girl in that outfit, I'm prepared to suffer unspeakable torture for the rest of eternity." said Glorfindel as he pictured Clara in her leather body suit, the very one she had worn on their 1'st honymoon.

Clara walked into the chamber, wearing her usual black robes and uncovered the tray of various torture instrament's in the middle of the room.

Glorfindel swore

~Edit by Clara Keep the language toned down sweetheart.

glorfindel

02-04-2003, 02:27 AM

"Start with him start with him!!!!!" said both soon to be screaming sith straped to the the sideboard's of Clara's ship.

"Clara, Please dont torture me, you like me, or at least you used to. remember our 1'st honymoon, we spent the first three week's in hospital because I hit on that waitress and you threw the 10 pound stone ashtray at me which then bounced off my head and broke the glass in the window of our cruise ship just near the nebula on the outer ring's, and we were both nearly sucked out into space? then we got out of hospital and spent the next three week's in our hotel room and dident sleep one night of it then got thrown out the hotel because the neighbours werre complaining about the noise? we had fun then right?" asked Glorfindel desperatly

"Yea, the noise was us shouting at eack other about who's fault it was that the window got broken by the ashtray, then it was about how MY credit card became overdrawn when you spent two day's out 'getting the paper', then it was about the credit card bill comeing back whith 14 different strip clubs chrarged to it!" replied Clara as she sharpened varoius bladed tools and bluntened other's.

"OK, bad example I'll admit that. what about the seccond honymoon? that one went off without a hitch, we spent six week's traveling the galaxy and dident leave the room once, we only left the bedroom to go to the bathroom and occasionally to eat, though so far as I recall we ate a few time's in the bathroom as well." Said Glorfindel with a wry smile as he remembered various aspect's of thet trip.

Clara

02-04-2003, 06:55 AM

Clara rolled her eyes. "The same one where you spent most of your time looking for clubs where you could watch the podracers? Then set the hotel room on fire with one of your... toys, then abused the manager and got us thrown out and we ended up stuck on Hoth? Yes, I remember that honeymoon, and no, I don't remember anything good about it."

She picked up a needle and moved toward Glorfindel. "This is an agent that will make you tell the truth no matter what is asked." She ingected him. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll just slip out while it takes hold."

As she walked from the room, they just heard her muttering. "I would love to find out where you got those undergardments, while you smell like perfume when you come home, and exactly what happened to my pet Rancor. I doubt very much the Krayt Dragon ate her."

glorfindel

02-07-2003, 05:05 AM

a few moment's later Flip turned to Glorfindel and said "So, you have to tell the truth now, no matter the question?"

Glorfindel tried to focuss for a moment, failed and replied "yes, I do. And before you ask no I am not gay."

"Are we gonna be able to escape?" asked Flip

"Nope, not a snowball's chance in hell for you and I now. Any further question's ask quickly because she's going to be back soon." Replied Glorfindel sluring slightly as he spoke.

"How good is Clara in bed?" Asked Flip sounding a little TOO interested

"Trust me when I say you have no idea." Replied Glorfindel with a smile.