Things People Say....

[sharyntyre]

I just went through the few pages of stuff and did not see anything like this. Here is the idea, we have all heard and use wierd expressions, slang, some of which are down right funny. I thought it would be amusing to share them. I will start with a couple for examples and hope you guys add more.

Please post one at a time...

I am busier than a one legged man at an a$$kicking

As nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

[sharyntyre]

is a frog's arse water tight?

Come on Folks! there has to be hudreds of these around the world....meh maybe it wasn't my best idea.

[Jedi Master Harrison]

I think that this is a great idea for a thread, but I am really struggling to come up with anything that it acceptable to be posted here. I'm sure I will think of something.

How about 'it's raining cats and dogs', what's that all about?!

[Emalin]

^ Be careful, don't step in a poodle! *snicker*


I found this Portugeuse idiom online:




He's like a racing mackerel.

[Armar-se em carapau de corrida]

The mackerel is not exactly a noble fish. So a racing mackerel - a mackerel who's swimming faster than the others - is a person who thinks he's a big shot but, in fact, is a nobody.


:lol:

[sharyntyre]

cool Em :)

and no worrys JMH you seem a witty fellow, raining cats and dogs is one of those sayings, yeah.


here's one moms used to tell me about my taste in women. "you have porsha taste on a volkswagon buget" and "Champaign taste on a beer buget."

heheh, meaning more or less I tend to chase ladies who most would consider 'out of my league"

[Darill Cyllem]

Take your pick:
-He's not the brightest crayon in the box.
-He's not the brightest casino in Reno.

(i rather prefer the one that rhymes)

[sharyntyre]

Up S*&T creek without a paddle.

[Darill Cyllem]

a confusing situation can be like the blind leading the blind

[Darth Massacrus]

its so humid here I feel like a baking meatloaf in water

[Darill Cyllem]

Where i live we have a lot of mosquitoes in the summer. We refer to them as our state bird.


Does that one count? Darth Massacrus's post made me think of it. (shudder - i prefer the winter)

[sharyntyre]

she/he has an aligator mouth and hummingbird ass.

[Darth Massacrus]

a mass of gas with no class came out the @ss, they say...

[sharyntyre]

he is so weak he could not fight his way out of a wet paper sack.

[Darill Cyllem]

one could translate quite a few "yo mama" jokes into more general use...
e.g.
-so stupid s/he thought a quarter back was change
-so foul even chickens won't talk to him/her

[Darth Massacrus]

they say this guy is as sharp as a bag of wet hair

[nefertiti]

....or as dumb as a box of rocks......

[Darill Cyllem]

i compare things to death with some frequency. As in: "the class i teach Monday at 8am is Death."

[sharyntyre]

"she dropped a bomb on me" when given bad news

[Darill Cyllem]

as excited as a kid in a candy store

[Darth Massacrus]

I'm as excited as a bull in a china shop

I'm as excited as fireworks at an oil refinery

[Darill Cyllem]

giddy as a school boy!

I alwasy used/heard the expression "bull in a china shop" was for something that turned out badly or some kind of "disaster" (like a messy room). Hadn't heard the excited use before, Darth M, interesting!

[Jedi Master Harrison]

My favourite: as confused as a blind female homosexual in a fishmongers.

[sharyntyre]

^^ what she said....


A few fries short of a happy meal

[Darill Cyllem]

a few more similar sentiments:

-the lights are on, but nobody's home
-the car's in gear, but no one's at the wheel

[Jedi Master Harrison]

Tighter than a camel's ass in a sandstorm

[sharyntyre]

What's got your panties twisted

or

who peed in your cheerios

[nefertiti]

^ peed in cheerios? Never heard that one before....

A favorite of my moms in the old days...

I'm the one who brought you into this world... I'll be the one who takes you out......

[Darth Massacrus]

statement: did you have a big bowl of stupid for breakfast or something?

you cant take the heat, yet you're still in the kitchen

well, thats all folks...

[Darill Cyllem]

he got whacked with the ugly stick
:eek:

[Emalin]

On that vein...

He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch. :ugh:


(I would NEVER say that about anyone, though! It's mean. :innocent:)

[Jedi Master Harrison]

She's got a face that looks like it's been hit repeatedly with a bag of chisels.

[Darth Massacrus]

Tommy the Commie loves Salami

[Jedi Master Harrison]

He's got a great face for radio!

[sharyntyre]

:banghead: how did I forget ugly tree??

and face for radio, I use that still (everytime I see John Maddon)

thanks guys, how about....

As useless as T*Ts a man/bull

[Darth Massacrus]

"your neighborhood is so bad a hurricane could hit it and do 2o million in improvements..."

if hell froze over, wouldnt a snowball there have a much better chance?

[Jedi Master Harrison]

One of my mates, with regard to heavy sports results uses the phrase 'beaten like a ginger step-child.'

[Darill Cyllem]

haha, JMH... we say "like a red-headed step child" on 'tother side o' the pond :) . A friend of mine was once a read-headed step child for Halloween (it was funny, despite the questionable taste).
And here's another one, just for JMH (since i've gathered you like U2):
"a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle"

[sharyntyre]

they ran like their a$$es were on fire and their feet were catching.


I like the holloween gag!

[Jedi Master Harrison]

haha, JMH... we say "like a red-headed step child" on 'tother side o' the pond :) . A friend of mine was once a read-headed step shild for Halloween (it was funny, despite the questionable taste).
And here's another one, just for JMH (since i've gathered you like U2):
"a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle"

Ah yes, that is a classic U2 lyric, though I believe they did borrow it from a female writer, I forget who though. :scratchchin:

My humour is very questionable taste, I would have found that hilarious!

Now, why do people 'take things with a pinch of salt'? I used that expression today myself and then realised I have no idea of its origins! :scratchchin:

[Darth Massacrus]

"man was that guy angry! He was like a pig that lost its voice!"

(disgruntled, get it?)

[nefertiti]

Often attributed to Gloria Steinem. Other claims for origination point to Flo (Florynce) Kennedy, or to an anonymous author who painted the slogan on a wall at University of Wisconsin in 1969.


Gloria Steinem had this to say in a letter she wrote to Time magazine in autumn 2000:"In your note on my new and happy marital partnership with David Bale, you credit me with the witticism 'A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.' In fact, Irina Dunn, a distinguished Australian educator, journalist and politician, coined the phrase back in 1970 when she was a student at the University of Sydney."

[Darth Massacrus]

What's got your panties twisted

or

who peed in your cheerios


I was inspired by the cheerios quote to say: "who took a dump in your pudding???"

[Darill Cyllem]

a missile-firing Boba Fett action figure might "sell like hot cakes"

[Darth Massacrus]

^yes, there'd be a "stampede Pamplona-style" with "Springerish fights" in order to get one of those^....

[sharyntyre]

in Texas mid 80s we picked up the phrase

Well Sh*t fire and fall back in it

[Darill Cyllem]

A difficult desicion can have you stuck "between a rock and a hard place."

[Jedi Master Harrison]

'Out of the frying pan and into the fire.'

[sharyntyre]

right! or

choosing between the devil and his daughter.

I say bring the daughter on 8P

[nefertiti]

What's the one....to many cooks in the kitchen...spoil the soup?

[Darill Cyllem]

Yeah, nefertiti - i've also heard "spoil the pot" (instead of soup)

[Zedekk]

Can't make an omlet without breaking some eggs.

[sharyntyre]

I like that, I love omlets.


I don't stutter and your ears don't flap.

[Darth Massacrus]

^since you cant stand the heat, why are you still in the kitchen???

[Darill Cyllem]

"the buck stops here"

[Zedekk]

We have nothing to fear, but fear itself.

[Darth Massacrus]

^actually, I've also heard "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself, as well as a crippling, decade long depression, German militarism, a looming World War, and vast unemployement."

"a day that will live in infamy"

[Jedi Master Harrison]

"Don't cry over spilt milk."

[Darth Massacrus]

"geez, these pretzels are making me thirsty" (popularized by Cosmo Kramer on Seinfeld)

[Darill Cyllem]

subtle as a knife

[sharyntyre]

I tossed this thought at Nef last night and she loved it

The only difference between men and boys is the price of their toys.

[Jedi Master Harrison]

^ Yeah, that's a great one!

[Darth Massacrus]

^so's that^

"fred done said he been fed bread in bed"

[nefertiti]

Moi? :scratchchin: :shocked:

Are ya sure I wasn't saying hahaha to the "bull in the china shop?".....hahahaha Nah...I did...I was thinkin' about Fallen One's babe farm...boy and their toys... hahahaha

[sharyntyre]

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed

[Jedi Master Harrison]

"Three sheets to the wind."

[sharyntyre]

cool. a decent but not great kid rock tune too.

to the wind.

my group of friends in pheonix, late teen years, said that as a way of saying 'just let it go' or forget about it.

[Darill Cyllem]

There are a number of odd expressions for dying:
-kick the bucket
-bought the farm
... come to mind right away - others?

And the above brings to mind the various uses of the word "bought":
1) literally, as in: "I purchased something."
2) a statement about belief ("i'm not buying it" = "i don't believe you")
3) dying (Obi-Wan bought it on the first Death Star)

[Jedi Master Harrison]

'Snuff it'

[Darill Cyllem]

Good one, JMH.

Someone who's a poor dancer might have two left feet.

[Darth Massacrus]

^likewise, someone who has bad handwriting might 'have two left hands'

[JackBauer24]

I was sweatin more than a hooker in church on sunday!

The saying I HATE is when people say "I could care less." Good God. It's "I COULDN'T care less." If you say "I could care less" it means you actually care about whatever it is you're trying to malign. Idiots.

[Darth Massacrus]

"he was as out of place as a strait, white, male, Republican, Church going, conservative, gun nut in San Francisco"-attributed to one of my professors


"he's so boring just hearig his voice makes me fall into a coma!"

"friutier than a crate of skittles"

"she's slept with more people than the San Fernando Valley"

"more stereotypical than a drunken Don Rickles"

[Darill Cyllem]

someone good with plants is described as having a "green thumb"

[Jedi Master Harrison]

'like flies round sh:censored: ' to describe people flocking somewhere.

[Darill Cyllem]

Today, i've started out on the right foot :)

[JackBauer24]

Woke up on the wrong side of the planet.

[Darth Massacrus]

while barbequing a pig on a stick, you could say that youve 'porked the pork'

'as unhealthy as a gas station hotdog'

[Zedekk]

Another one bites the dust.

[sharyntyre]

This one at work drives me nuts on several levels

It is what it is...

what else could it be????

[Darth Massacrus]

pie in the sky

[Darill Cyllem]

i wouldn't kick him out of bed for eating cookies

[Zedekk]

"eye patch"

[JackBauer24]

"eye patch"

ROTFLMFAO!!

[Darill Cyllem]

'Out of the frying pan and into the fire.'

Or... alternately:
Escaping goblins only to be attacked by wargs.


Anyone? No?
*Shuffles off to enjoy her nerdery alone.*

[JackBauer24]

Or... alternately:
Escaping goblins only to be attacked by wargs.


Anyone? No?
*Shuffles off to enjoy her nerdery alone.*

Escaping the Empire only to be attacked by Sith.

[Zedekk]

*singing* fifteen bucks, little man put that **** in my hand, noitch noitch noitch.

[Darill Cyllem]

"bats in the bellfry"

[sharyntyre]

my sister picked this one up somewhere recently

"she looks like she's been ridden long and hard, then put up wet"

[Darth Massacrus]

as heard in every single SW game and film almost: I've got a bad feeling about this.....

[Jedi Master Harrison]

i wouldn't kick him out of bed for eating cookies

Trust you to pick that one. :nahnah:

my sister picked this one up somewhere recently

"she looks like she's been ridden long and hard, then put up wet"

That is freakin hilarious!

as heard in every single SW game and film almost: I've got a bad feeling about this.....

A classic!


My addition: like a bat out of hell

[sharyntyre]

cold as a witch's tit

[Darth Massacrus]

moist as a pornstar's 'insert part here'

[Darth Massacrus]

people also say WTF?

[Zedekk]

I'd say wtf if anyone said "as moist as a pornstars eye".

[Darth Massacrus]

^well, there is also an word I would use in that regard, as well: (expletive deleted)


BTW: some people say 'expletive deleted'

[Darill Cyllem]

Trust you to pick that one. :nahnah:

l

MOI?? JMH, how dare you! :bop:
:innocent:

I've got songs by the Temptations in my head:
"I've got so much honey, the bees envy me."
"I've got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees."

[Oscar the Grouch]

"Try as hard as you want, you can't polish a turd."

[Darill Cyllem]

You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear.

[Zedekk]

"Don't throw your pearls to the pigs"

[Jedi Master Harrison]

Sweating like a donkey in a spacesuit.

[Darth Massacrus]

as generic as corn flakes

[Darill Cyllem]

"Don't throw your pearls to the pigs"

something unappreciated is like pearls before swine

[sharyntyre]

The toes you step on now could be attached to the A$$ you have to kiss later.


Don't burn your bridges behind you.

[Darth Massacrus]

as hungry as Godzilla at a Tokyo zoo