The Chuck Norris thread. . .

[jayce76]

Game is simple / Finish sentence . . .


http://img181.imageshack.us/img181/849/untitledou9.png (http://imageshack.us)


Chuck Norris ________________________________________.

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris once got an erection while doing Karate . .

http://img181.imageshack.us/img181/3076/untitledup0.png (http://imageshack.us)

There were no survivers . . . .

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris loves to be filmed beaten & shirtless . . .

http://img206.imageshack.us/img206/7611/untitledhd9.png (http://imageshack.us)

[Javen]

Chuck Norris thread might get locked.

[jayce76]

Chock Norris once threw an elderly woman's groceries down a flight of stairs for calling him, chucky . . .

http://img87.imageshack.us/img87/9177/untitledws1.png (http://imageshack.us)

[o8_jedi]

Chuck Norris's tears have been known to cure cancer. It's too bad that he's never cried.



Ever.

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris once brought an M-16 and a bowl of spicey chili to a T.B.N. taping of 'Praise the Lord' . . .

http://img205.imageshack.us/img205/1484/tycv3.png (http://imageshack.us)

[Zedekk]

Chuck Norris doesn't like odd numbers so he karate chopped Pluto (formerly known as the ninth planet in our solar system) and now we have a nice even number.

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris loves America . . .

http://img207.imageshack.us/img207/2646/typo3.png (http://imageshack.us)

He stands for truth , justice and kicking ass . . .

[o8_jedi]

Chuck Norris is in the process of suing NBC for copyright infringment, claiming that "Law" and "Order" are the names of his left and right fists.

[Ithorian guy]

Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

[jayce76]

One night while engaged in a battle of grappling with his wife , chuck Norris's equitment did'nt perform up to expectations. So he beat the hell out of'it . . .

http://img247.imageshack.us/img247/7568/untitledas8.png (http://imageshack.us)

[mattypo]

when Chuck Norris goes for a swim, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet water gets Chuck Norris

[Momin327]

Similar to Ithorian Guy's:

The sun does not burn Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris burns the sun.

[o8_jedi]

Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called "Walker: Texas Chain Saw Massacre"

[Ithorian guy]

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take $hit from anybody.

[Blizzard]

Oh hell, Chuck found the Senate.

Please upload your pics so they aren't a bunch of red X's when imageshack deletes them.

[Zedekk]

God contracted Chuck Norris to create the world and he did it in 3 days and didn't need a rest afterwards so he made the rest of the universe

[jayce76]

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take $hit from anybody.


http://img206.imageshack.us/img206/1217/untitledgp0.png (http://imageshack.us)

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris once changed all our lives on a weekly basis . . .

http://img222.imageshack.us/img222/181/untitledlh1.png (http://imageshack.us)

[Sargoth]

Whaat!!! 20 posts and not a single mention of Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking someone in the head?? For shame!


In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

[Blizzard]

Let's try this again....

Please upload your pics so they aren't a bunch of red X's when imageshack deletes them.

Thank you.

[Zedekk]

I was roundhouse kicked in the head (but not by Chuck) that's why I didn't remember the full story, sorry. If Chuck had roundhouse kicked me I'd be dead, and I would have lost a few past lives too.

[jayce76]

On the set - Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a big time producer for asking him to switch hats . . .

[Ithorian guy]

Jesus walks on water, but Chuck Norris walks on Jesus. :D (Sorry Jesus, I just thought this one was very funny.)

[jayce76]

I'm Sorry Blizz , . . .

It just ain't as funny without the big pics!

[jayce76]

Jesus walks on water, but Chuck Norris walks on Jesus. :D (Sorry Jesus, I just thought this one was very funny.)


Satan drops in and Says:

http://img217.imageshack.us/img217/964/rws3.png (http://imageshack.us)

Welcome my knew friend , I hope you like it warm . . . .

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris dosn't fall off the wagon , he kicks the hell out of it!

http://img246.imageshack.us/img246/9103/esuv9.png (http://imageshack.us)

[o8_jedi]

As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later, they gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.

[Zedekk]

Every solar eclipse is caused by Chuck Norris when he leaps into the air to travel long distances

[jayce76]

:lol: Hillarious fellas . . . .

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris's belt buckles have been known to blind small children and incoming aircraft . . . .

http://img181.imageshack.us/img181/412/gfsm6.png (http://imageshack.us)

[Zedekk]

Chuck Norris shaves off all his chest hair once a week (it grows back that fast) to donate it to "locks of Love" Foundation.

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris's facial hair has been known to frighten: Martial artist , areobic instructers , total gyms and bears . . . .

http://img226.imageshack.us/img226/4783/untitledmx8.png (http://imageshack.us)

[Sargoth]

Simply by pulling on both ends, Chuck Norris can stretch diamonds back into coal.

[o8_jedi]

Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.

[Momin327]

Chuck Norris doesn't use the Force. The Force uses Chuck Norris.

[Darth Star]

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

[DblDwn]

Chuck Norris voted for Average Joe's to compete in the finals of the American Dodgeball Association of America.

Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive and........Dodge.

[o8_jedi]

Chuck Norris was going to be in the Street Fighter II arcade game. When programmers were asked if the reason why every button resulted in a roundhouse kick to the face was a glitch, they replied, "It's no glitch."

[Sarah-Leia]

Chuck Norris is a guy who I have never heard of.

[Zedekk]

^allow me to introduce you to him... lemme put it this way if Chuck Norris threw Mark Hamill... well he wouldn't be on earth anymore, and would probably still be sailing away in the milkyway galaxy.

[jayce76]

Chuck Norris is a man who's gone through many changes . . .

http://img89.imageshack.us/img89/6213/rfsxh6.png (http://imageshack.us)

[Sarah-Leia]

Does he practise martial arts? (My sentence: Chuck Norris is a guy who possibly practises martial arts)

^ And wow, that is a change...

[Darth Star]

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

[Sarah-Leia]

Chuck Norris has a moustache.

[o8_jedi]

There are no races. Just people that Chuck Norris beat into different shades of black and blue.

[Rebel Astromech Droid]

Chuck Norris once swallowed a rubix cube and pooped it out solved.

[Rebel Astromech Droid]

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

:w00t:

[Rebel Astromech Droid]

Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."

[kopernikuz]

If Chuck Norris were gay...

*POST INTERUPTED BY ROUNDHOUSE KICK*
Note: Flowers can be sent to Narwol/Flanders Funeral Home.

[Zedekk]

Chuck Norris built the pyrimids of Egypt in 10 minutes and then built the Great Wall of China in 5 minutes as an after-thought because he was bored.

[mattypo]

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting as that would imply potential failure,

Chuck Norris Goes Killing